Question No. 21

I present myself as a strong, confident, independent, intelligent woman.
This may cause some to feel envious or threatened.
As a result, I am fair game for criticism, judgment and condemnation.

"She's tough, she can take it."

I'd just like to say that what shows on the outside isn't always an accurate representation of what's going on inside. Strength of character and self-control is a skill, not a gift.

Just because someone appears strong doesn't mean they don't feel or hurt...or bleed.

Just because someone appears confident, doesn't necessarily mean that they don't carry a lifetime of doubts inside of them. They are just better at hiding them.

Just because someone is independent doesn't mean they are sinful or not submitting to proper authority. They have just learned, usually the hard way, that they can't fully depend upon others.

Just because someone is intelligent doesn't mean that they don't have emotions. Intelligent people have emotions, too, they just are good at disguising them.

And just because one is a women doesn't mean she doesn't deserve respect - even if she is moving in a man's world or is perceived as not keeping within the boundaries of the so-called 'role' of religious women.

"You're a leader...this is what happens. It happens to me all the time. I just oil those feathers and let it slide right off. If I can do it, you can, too. Remember, you are held to a higher standard."

I have come to the conclusion that it is short-sighted and rude to assume just because someone appears strong and confident, they don't feel hurt like someone who is shy or passively submissive. Moreover, confidence is not indicative of self-centered arrogance. It seems to have never occurred to some that those that appear strong and confident may have developed those traits as a protection and response to betrayal, harsh criticism and judgment in their life.

Keep your chin up, square those shoulders.
Flood your accusers with kindness, love your enemies.
Respond instead of react; he who gets angry first loses.
Don't show that it hurts; there will be plenty of time to cry later.

Armor, that is...not arrogance.

And a common misconception about me.