Thursday, February 23, 2012

Question No. 1


A year ago I was reeling from the intense grief and pain of betrayal and loss.

Today, I can wake up without crying. 

A year ago I had a very difficult time studying Scripture, struggled with saying the liturgy and dreaded the festivals due to haunting and painful memories.

Today, I can study effectively because I have taken ownership and responsibility of my own faith and traditions, not relying on someone to hold my hand. I have finally learned who my true leader and teacher is.

A year ago I was desperately hoping against hope that those I love would do the right thing - that what was happening was not real.

Today, I can be honest enough with myself to acknowledge the manipulation, cruelty, lack of compassion and truth of their actions.

A year ago I was immersing myself in worship and inspirational music trying to keep my head above water.

Today, I can listen to many types of music without falling into dark and deep melancholy (well, mostly).

A year ago I didn't realize how empathic I truly am.

Today, I can embrace and understand it with the help of HaShem.

A year ago I took my health for granted.

Today, I cannot.

A year ago I couldn't appreciate and anticipate a new day with hope.

Today, thankfully, I can.

2 comments:

Ari C'rona said...

Baruch HaShem... I'm so grateful.

Netanya said...

I love how contemplative this is. Though I would never wish that level of pain on you, I am very thankful for the lessons we've all learned.

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